Sunday, October 3, 2010

My Dodge letter and thoughts

Well, Blondie beat me to it, but here is my confirmation letter from Gregory Dodge confirming my resignation from the church. Blondie called me when we received them and she was very excited. I was out of town, but when I got home, I immediately wanted to see the letters. It is kind of a weird feeling seeing four individual letters for each member or our family indicating that we are no longer members. I like the fact that the letter is simple and to the point, no guilt, or pressure for us to come back.

Since we have received the letters, Blondie and I have had some good discussions about why we are happy to be out of the church and why we feel it is wrong. Here are some of my thoughts. . .

Everyone is born on this earth with unique qualities, thoughts, and cultures. No one is the same. No one thinks exactly the same. No one acts exactly the same. No one looks exactly the same. Some people may be more conservative while others are more liberal. These various qualities are what make living on the earth so interesting and worth living for.

The Mormon Church comes along and says, "You are a great person and we love you, come join us to live in happiness." However, that is not all that the church says. They want you to join them, but there are things about yourself that you need to adjust. You cannot come as you are. You thought that having a cup of coffee made you happy? Well, the church is here to tell you that coffee does not make you happy. You are a man that enjoys wearing earrings? Well, that will just not do. A woman that wants to wear more than just one pair of earrings? You should reconsider your moral priorities. You have attractions to people of the same sex? We have therapy sessions to help you overcome your sinful nature.

The Mormon Church wants everyone to be a part of their church, but they don't want people to come as they are. The church wants everyone to change aspects about themselves that will conform to the vanilla, generic church member that the leaders of the church like to see. Clean-cut, white shirt and tie, missionary haircut, no facial hair for men. Modest dresses, modest unnoticeable earrings, very simple make up that does not bring attention for women.

How boring is this? Do I want to walk around a bunch of drones? Women who are more concerned about whether they are showing too much skin with either a sleeveless shirt or a skirt above their knee? Then there is always the risk of whether their garments are showing. I will join the countless others in expressing just how ugly and stupid looking garments are. They are a truly asinine piece of clothing that is wasting members' time. They are truly shiny keys.

So, this is one of the reasons why I do not believe that the church is true. Why would a god create billions of people to come to earth with all their unique qualities and then expect all people to be exactly the same? What's the point? I do not agree with the Mormon Church in trying to change everyone to fit one mold. I love seeing unique people that are different. The gay couple, the person with too many tattoos, the punk with the purple hair, the business man in a suit, my great neighbor that hunts everything, this is what I love, the variety. Imagine if everyone on the earth was Mormon. How boring would that be? Would I even want to live on an earth like that? I think not.


  1. I really love this post. Whenever I go home for the holidays I am always stuck by how similar everyone is the way that they look, the way that they speak and the way that they act in Utah. I am always a bit glad to head back to the airport and see variety again after a stay in Utah.

    The world really is much more interesting when everyone is unique and themselves, rather then fitting into a mold...

  2. I am grateful to live in many area's where being a drone is not encouraged at all. I see it in heavily Mormon populated areas...Utah, Idaho, etc. I don't enjoy going to Church there at all. It makes me crazy.'s not like that everywhere. If you go to a Sacrement Meeting in Africa, or Agrentina, it's like a completely different Church. All the leadership are converts, not from long lines of Morman heritage.
    I think it makes a difference. I left the Church for 20 years and came back...I look at the Church differently than I did when I was a Molly Mormon. I go when I want, I dress as I want, I have 4 tats and numerous earrings, and I don't care what anyone thinks. Mind you I am not a young rebel. I am 52 yrs old, and part of a growing group of "New Order Mormons".
    What matters is your relationship with Jesus according to your intimate relationship with Him and what he tells you. He wants us to be joyful not unhappy. I looked deeply into myself and my attitude and beliefs...and that is what I practice, within The Church.
    Blessed Be! and Peace be with you. I mean that sincerely.

  3. Clance, I am happy that you have found what works for you in the church. You definitely do not sound like the standard Mormon that many members try to be. A 52 year old rebel, I love it.

  4. Congratulations on getting your letter!

  5. I'm jealous. I'm trying to get one of those, but I got a letter saying that it was an "ecclesiastical matter" and that our bishop had to contact us, and how the eternal consequences were going to be serious... :-(

  6. Becky, check out my wife's post about the original letter we received when we first sent in our letter, it is exactly what you are referring to.

    Follow up Letter

    Also, check out my previous post about our visit with our bishop.

    Visit with our Bishop

  7. Congrats on getting your letter!

    I find it funny that, while the Mormon church professes "modesty" so much, I never saw a more done-up group of women than when I attended a Mormon service. The scrupulosity their doctrines engender draws more attention to looks and appearance, not less. They cause more superficiality and materialism, not less.